Happy Anniversary to me!
Happy Anniversary to me!
Happy Anniversary to me!
Happy Anniversary to me!

Today is the one year anniversary of the ex moving out. It just occurred to me today (because I can be a bit slow) that it happened with a phone call. Yep, he called and said that he had decided not to come home. Huh, didn’t even have the nerve to do it in person. He came over the next day when I was at work and looted the furniture.

What a difference a year makes. I was thinking about this last night while I was cuddled up with the SO. Would I have been surprised at this time last year to know that I would be in a relationship? No. Somehow that never worried me. Would I be surprised to know that my major stressor would be getting rid of all the accumulated crap that I somehow acquired in the six years since my last move? Yes. My major worry at the time was financial. I was broke. I know all the statistics – women who get divorced lose the money game. I’ve had the opposite affect.

I did lose 2/3 of my household income. Actually I lost more than that because I’ve doubled the amount I’m working so right now my income is 2/3 less than it was last year. I’ve been majorly helped by the fact that he is still paying for the house while I live there. Having to move out would have been rough. But he was a huge spender. I still can’t quite reconcile where all the money went. My income paid the bills except for the house and his car. Those were significant expenses but he would have had lots of money left over. He was always broke. On my own and with lots less money I actually have savings and a retirement plan now. It amazes me.

So if I could go back and tell my year-ago self anything I’d say, “You might not believe this right this second but your life is going to be so much better at this point next year. And be nice to a weird guy that you’re going to meet online who lives nearby because even though you keep blowing him off he’s persistent…”