From Witches’ Weekly via Turtleheart.
Personal Ceremonies
If you were to plan your own Wedding or Funeral ceremony, would you create two separate ceremonies for pagan and non-pagan folk, or would you just plan a ceremony around your beliefs. How would you feel if any non-pagan friends or family did not wish to attend such a ceremony?
I’ve thought about this before because the wedding ceremony that I had would not work for me at all now. I don’t plan on getting married again but if the husband gets out of line and I need to upgrade to a new model, here’s what I’m thinking. I’d want it to be outside but the pessimistic part of me starts wondering immediately about rain. I went to a wedding in a conservatory once so it was surrounded by plants but still inside. Maybe that would work. I don’t think I’d do a straight pagan ceremony but it would definately be something “bizarre” for my relatives. It would give them something to talk about for a while. They’d definately come. How else would they get to see what strange thing I’m up to now?
For a funeral – I want to be cremated. I don’t care if there is a viewing. The husband and any other living relatives can fight that out. The husband is strongly anti-viewing and the family is strongly pro-viewing. I figure I won’t care at that point. What I don’t want is a lot of “She’s in a better place now” stuff. It drives me crazy. My idea of a great funeral is the one in the movie Love Actually. No religious stuff and then there is an upbeat slide show to the Bay City Rollers.
My fiance and I are currently planning our wedding/handfasting on June 21st and our families are just going bonkers! Only our parents and his brother & sister-in-law know I am a Witch, the rest are all ultra-churchy. We are planning it as an old traditional Irish/Celtic ceremony (to get away with hiding my customs). He is athiest so doesn’t care one way or the other, but the rest of the family thinks I have been corrupted by the devil lmao! I honestly never thought our sisters and his grandma would be so complicated. I think they are still all coming just grumbles about being outdoors and on Midsummer (that is evil they say ).
As far as a funeral, I want to be cremated and not too concerned about much else. Like the others, I’m not going to stick around for that part : )
I did plan my own wedding, barefoot, in a garden, with a ring of flowers. We were not handfasted, but the entire ceremony had a pagan feel. We did not invite anyone other than immediate family, so we didn’t have to worry about someone not wanting to attend. Luckily none of our immediate family is ultra-religious.
As to my/DH’s funerals, we’ve already discussed it, and planned them out. We both want parties to celebrate our lives, not somber occasions, and we both want to be cremated. After 2 family member’s church funerals this last year (dreadful occasions), we both agreed that our families don’t get a say in the matter.
Quit planning your wedding! You’re already married! 😉
And I am totally with you on the funeral thing – I just don’t care. I don’t plan on being around to participate..heh heh
Ooo, a conservatory is a nice idea. We had a back-up plan at our outdoor wedding– there was also a lovely fieldstone lodge (including a picturesque fireplace) at the location that we could herd guests in to if it started to rain.
My husband and I had a civil ceremony when we got married and my mother was upset because “God” was not mentioned anywhere. I thought it was beautiful. The only thing I would change would be I would add a few flares of a handfasting in. I like the binding of the hands and wrist so I would add that. As far as the funeral goes, I don’t care. I won’t be here. I think it will be more for those left behind to morn. My mom is very relgious so if she is still living then I would like it to be in a church so that she can feel that I am in “that better place”. I can’t see adding to the unhappiness that those left behind feel by having something that might hurt of offend them. (as I said I won’t know it anyway).